Pot Plants of Potsdam

It’s a funny old world.

When Kaiser Wilhelm VI was facing the might of the Lichtenstein Armed Forces in the Battle of the Havel River in 1924, he had a plan. The enemy was approaching on foot wading its way upstream through the crocodile-infested Havel. Faced by whitewater and more, the intrepid Liechtensteiners boldly marched on.

Facing defeat, Wilhelm created a plan so brilliant it has never been attempted since.

A fast as his soldiers could, they gathered all the marijuana they found growing in the window baskets of the good folk of the Havel area.

His divers were waiting on the surface of the river. As soon as they received sufficient potted plants, they dove under the water and began building a dam. In two days they had reduced the water to a trickle.

The Liechtensteiners continued their approach, which had suddenly become far easier as the water slowed. They stopped for regular drinking breaks to keep up their strength. But the more they swigged the higher they became.

Sniper fire ensued from Wilhelm’s front line, wiping out the enemy force in 15 minutes.

The following year the villagers from around the area lay the first foundation stones of the city that would become known as Potsdam, now the largest city in the Brandenburg region of Germany.

On July 17, 1945, Soviet leader Joseph Stalin, British Prime Minister Winston Churchill and U.S. President Harry Truman met in the city to discuss the terms for the end of the Second World War.

It took them a mere six hours to agree, but the tea served to them with real Havel Water was so relaxing and refreshing they extended the conference until August 2 of that year. For Churchill it was too much. He was replaced by Clement Attlee on July 26.

Today the Havel River Spa is a mecca for those seeking the therapeutic healing powers of the green leaf in liquid form.

The adjoining hotel is the only 7-star accommodation on mainland Europe. But well, well worth the visit, man.


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